Tuesday Joke: Honda Customized Wing

As I went to grab my lunch, Chinese Takeout, I couldn't help but notice this awesome customized Honda sitting in the parking lot. Anyone want to bet this car belongs to a single man?



I am a bit fan of Do It Yourself, but this is a multi-stage mistake. During any part of the process, from wood selection, to bolting it on to painting it a fetching silver after bolting it on, this guy could have changed his mind.

Here's to you Silver Wooden Honda Wing guy for not caring what the world thinks!

Four software development guidelines

The only thing I hate worse than making mistakes, is repeating a mistake. Yesterday I was working through a very frustrating set of circumstances and had gotten myself micro-focused. This is a mental equivalence of painting oneself in the corner. Bassil Karam, one of the coolest guys you will ever meet and a very talented programmer, helped me out of my mental hole. I made several problem solving mistakes and I want to share them with others.

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Three software development guidelines

This post has been changed to Four Software Development Guidelines

Here is a funny picture for your trouble:

Public Service Announcement - Firefox Caches Select Box State

Remember that the Firefox Browser caches the selected position on Select Boxes. I am not sure how to turn this feature off.

This means that if you select an option on a select box, and refresh, firefox will remember your select box index position. I've noticed the same behaviour on checkboxes and radio buttons, so be aware when debugging.

Heuristically speaking, I like the function, especially when filling out long involved forms. It is however, a complete pain in my MULE when I am debugging applications and can't figure out why the box isn't selected to the expected option.



Pressing CTRL+F5 redraws everything sans state.

On Dying Technologies - The Zune

What ever happened to the Zune MP3 player by Microsoft? I recall great mention of the Zune at the initial release, but precious little thereafter. There was even a man who got a tattoo of the Zune logo. Actually, he has two Zune themed tattoos. I find this inspirational, don't you? Apart from the lackluster performance of the Zune in the portable MP3 marketplace, the crumbling fan base and lack of interest from consumers as a whole, Mr Zune Tattoo breaks from the pack and permanently embosses the Insignia of dead technology on his arm. Twice.

I walk away from this entire experience with rekindled inspiration for the Ford Pinto Tattoo I've always wanted.

10 Tips on car ads

I am presently looking to replace my 'vintage' Porsche. She's been a great car but I have trouble stuffing my mountain bike inside. So I need something different. I spent an hour looking through the car section on raleigh.craigslist.org and felt absolutely compelled to write a quick article about how and how not to write car ads.

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From the You Can Not Be Serious file

I was poking around the web today and found a nice post from Doug Hughes about an SQL server issue. The post was commented 88 times. Many people showed their gratitude to Doug for posting the solution to a vexing problem. One commenter takes the cake however:

view plain print about
1Hi
2
3I have a same problem.
4I am Using SQL Server 2000 in my computer.
5I try to access the sql server 2000 from another computer. Its gives error.
6"unale to connect to server"
7
8Please fix it
9
10Thanks
11
12Posted By Jenkins on Jun. 21, 2006 at 7:16 AM

To which Joe Reinhart replied to, rather Tongue in Cheek:

view plain print about
1Jenkins,
2
3Care to send the IP addres and SA password?
4
5Posted By Joe Rinehart on Jun. 21, 2006 at 8:31 AM

Then I laughed even harder when I read: (I placed the x's in there. I have a conscience.)

view plain print about
1Hi Joe
2
3In "connect to SQL Server" Window.
4SQL Server : IP Address(114.x9.130.13)
5I select SQL Server authentication
6Login name : User Name (jenkins)
7Password : pwd (*****)
8
9Then i click ok.
10
11Its gives error.
12"unale to connect to server 114.x9.130.13"
13
14Please fix it
15
16Thanks
17Jenkins
18
19Posted By Jenkins on Jun. 21, 2006 at 8:55 AM

Wow! I'd love to know what happened to that server.....

Me as a Simpsons Character

I saw the "Create a Simpson's Character" post on Andy Jarrett's blog, so I gave it a go.

Scary how much realism I got with the hair. The Simpson's movie will be out July 27th 2007. I've been watching the adverts since Christmas and will be catching this in the theatre. If anyone in the Raleigh-Durham area wants to link up, i'll bring extra Twizzlers.

Rant: On Car Alarms

I was sitting on the porch today with the laptop and the excellent weather just enjoying myself.

As the breeze rustled the leaves and the birds sang, there was no place i'd rather be.

All of a sudden a car across the street began a Cacophonous Outburst awaking me from my midspring dream. Honk! Honk! Honk! Honk! I looked over in that direction looking for the Squad of Ski-Mask Clad Burglers in process of Grand Theft Auto.

Nothing but a squirrel. A very frightened squirrel.

The car in question is a very expensive German made luxury SUV no doubt outfitted with more sensors and microprocessors than the supercomputers of yesteryear. While I have no doubt the car felt it was in danger, try as I might, I could not identify the threat. If, in fact, the car was being stolen in another dimension, I see no reason for the alarm to extend into this dimension, the one where I was enjoying a nice spring day outside.

As a highly trained statistician, let me point out the following:

Elapsed Period 5/13/06 - 5/13/07
EventObserved Instances
Car Alarm64
Stolen Car0


Based on these scientific figures, Car Alarms are not very effective in relation to the rate of false positives

Rather than emit an ear piercing (and spring day shattering) noise, lets rewire all the car alarms to provide an electric shock to the bearer of the keys. This way, the owner would be instantaneously alerted to any perilous situation involving their automobile AND those enjoying a nice spring day outside could avoid senseless disturbance of the peace.

Granted, some of the car alarm incidents in the statistics table above were purposely activated by some selfish and ignorant car owner in hopes of locating their car in a parking lot.

My proposed solution does not address the 'I lost my car in a parking lot' problem. While perceived as a shortcoming of my innovation by some, I perceive it as a training issue, not one that needs a software solution. Rational adults can certainly agree that if the owner of a vehicle doesn't possess the mental capacity to remember where the automobile is parked, then the owner certainly has no business piloting a FIVE THOUSAND POUND cruise missile down busy streets

Obviously, this would be a disruptive technology and would require many hundreds of thousands of vehicles to be retrofitted with these new devices. The revenue generated by such activities would be enormous. Certainly more than I personally could spend in a lifetime. I have just received a patent from the United States Patent Office for my apparatus and am soliciting investors to bring it to market. If you would like to invest in this Ground Breaking Technology, and share in the immense returns from such a venture, please donate via the PayPal button on the left side of the page.

I look forward to many years of prosperity founded on this much needed technology.

I can't wait to get these games:

I was reading an article on Worst Games Ever. Here are some quotes that had me laughing:


The gameplay is almost as deep and engaging as flipping from one option to the next on a DVD menu...

It would take all of history's greatest geniuses working in unison with history's greatest untreated sewage to come up with uglier graphics.


Have you ever stepped on a nail during a seminar about trends in hydraulic pump insurance? If so, then keep doing it. It's more fun than this electronic wasteland.


Also, AIRCARS don't have brakes, so once you start accelerating, your only chance of survival is quickly putting in a different game. A typical AIRCARS adventure is you careening out of control through trees and waiting for your clumsy rolling bathtub to explode.


Good medicine for a cold rainy Sunday.